WAR

I am a strong advocate of autonomy but believe deployment is not a positive autonomous experience and is psychological warfare on relationships. The soldier who is in a war zone is put in a situation that requires them to act in a manner based solely on self preservation far from the values and morals that we are raised with in our society. They are not likely to share with the loved ones at home what they are experiencing or doing to protect the loved ones from worrying. The loved one(es) therefore cannot fully understand what the soldier is going through and may not be able to give the right kind of support or assurance the soldier may be yearning for. When the soldier comes home they are expected to switch gears and smoothly transition back into normal society where they may fear that what they have done or the choices they may have made under duress, may be viewed with disgust and aversion. This creates an environment where the soldier can not open up and share their experience and leaves the loved one in a position where they are unable to reach out and heal and show unconditional love and understanding. A wall is often created where the soldier suffers in silence thinking that they are still protecting their partner from the shame and embarrassment that they themselves are feeling but in fact their partner may be feeling lost, shut out and angry. This may help to explain in part why there is a 60-70% divorce rate in the Army...